through my eyes
by A Song Of Agony
Summary: this story is about lily's 6th year at hogwarts. she tells you about everything that is happening, especially about james. if you read it i'll make more sense.
1. the relationship untold

Through my eyes

I do not own anything. I only own the characters you don't recognize. (Darn)!!

Ch. 1: The relationship untold.

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It's my sixth year at Hogwarts now. I love it there. Everything about it is great. Except some people can be jerks. For example: James Potter.

James Potter is a pain n the butt. He has brown eyes, messy hair, glasses, and he's tall. Not that it matters to me. Some girls, correction almost all of the girls at Hogwarts worship the ground he walks on. But I don't. I'm not saying that I don't think he's cute, he's just very conceited. He's the leader of the group called the Marauders. It contains of Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew.

Sirius Black is a big time player. Remus Lupin is calmer one of the group. And peter Pettigrew is, I really don't know how to describe him. 

Enough about them, on to my friends. There's Esmeralda Perez. She's a very shy person, but one of my best friends. My other best friend is Diana Wells. She's not shy, but she's not the wildest person. And here they are.

"Hi Lily," Diana greeted.

"Hey Lils," said Esmeralda.

"Hi guys," I said "how was your guys' summer?" 

All of a sudden I see Diana blush. This is very weird because she never blushes. 

"What is it?" I ask her and all I hear is her mumbling. "Come on tell me," I begged.

"Remus asked me out," she replied quietly. 

My eyes widened in shock. I couldn't believe those words came out of her mouth.

"Lily, are you going to say something?" she asked me a nervously now. She probably thinks I died from shock. And in think I just might. So the only thing I could think of was this: "Holy shit,"

"I agree with you," Esmeralda said. I was so happy she agreed with me, because now I'm not the only one who was surprised. "She just told me yesterday," she finished.

"Look, I'm sorry. We started talking last year, and then he asked me out during the summer," she said.

"Well, isn't that sweet, Diana has a boyfriend," someone said who I knew right away who it was. Arrogant James Potter. Before I could say something, someone beat me to it. Remus Lupin.

"Shut up James!" Remus snapped. Now that I think of it, I've never seen him do that. 

"What?" he asked confused.

Diana was avoiding everyone's eyes. Blushing even more that before. "Diana is dating me," Remus announced calmer this time. 

"What- why didn't you tell us Moony?" Sirius said once he got over shock. 

"We wanted to wait," he said looking at Diana. Diana looked up and smiled at him.

"Do you guys want to sit with us?" she asked still looking at Remus.

"DIANA!" I hissed at her. She knew I hated Potter with fire-y passion. 

Potter, who heard me, replied grinning: " Well, aren't you generous, and we will love to sit with you thank you,". 

Sirius sat next to Esmeralda, Peter sat next to Sirius, Remus sat next Diana, of course, and to my luck, Potter sat next to me. (ewww!)

He looked at me, with that grin I hate. "Evans,".

"Potter," I replied with disgust. The rest of the train ride was ok. Apart from Potter bugging me. And every so often I would catch Sirius look at Esmeralda. I knew this year was going to be involved with Marauders. 

………………………………..................................................................


	2. jumping up with glee, right?

Through my eyes

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry potter.

Ch. 2: jumping up with glee, right?

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As I told you before that The Marauders were going to be around us a lot. Well, I wasn't wrong.

I'm happy that Diana and Remus are happy together, but it doesn't mean that we have to sit with them at dinner! Ok, I know I'm being selfish, but I don't want to sit with them, especially Potter! 

I was so happy when dinner was finally over. And I guess Esmeralda and Diana noticed it too.

"Come on," Diana started, "they're not that bad,"

"Not that bad? You know I hate Potter," I told them.

"Lily, you should stop hating him," Esmeralda told me as if it was the easiest thing to do.

"Why don't you see how it feels when someone keeps asking you out," I almost forgot, Potter always asks me to go out with him. And I always say no.

"Lily, he hasn't asked you out all day long. Nor has he looked at you for 5 minutes straight," she told me.

"Well, good," I replied, "good night,"

Whoa! Was it just me or was I disappointed back there? This can't be happening. I should be jumping up with glee right now. It's not like I want him to ask me out right? Oh god! 

DAMN, DAMN, DAMN, AND OH YEAH DAMN!

Exclamation point. Exclamation point. Exclamation point. 

Exclamation point. 

Please don't let me think like this God. Please I pray to you. HELP!


	3. face to face

Through my eyes

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry potter.

Ch. 3: face to face.

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Today is the first day of classes. Remember on how I was freaking out yesterday. That whole Potter thing just came back to me. One minute I'm brushing my teeth and boom I remembered. And I'm hearing giggling. What are these girls up to?

"Diana, stop it!" exclaimed Emerald.

"What are you doing Di?" Oh yeah, we call Diana, Di, for short.

"Nothing," she responded innocently, "kiss-y, kiss, kiss!"

"What is up with her?" I asked Esmeralda.

"She's doing that because she thinks Sirius likes me," she responded.

"Well, he does," Diana said automatically. 

"No he doesn't," she argued back, "I'm going down to breakfast," And with that, she left.

"You shouldn't tease her like that. You know how she gets," I told Diana.

"I know. But he really does like her. He kept staring at her yesterday," she told me.

"I know," I agreed. I'm starting to wonder if I should tell Diana about the whole potter situation. I should tell her. I am. "Um, Diana?" I started.

"Yeah," she responded.

Ok, here goes: "I, uh- well- er- I'm ready,"

Ok I know, I chickened out.

………………………………... ……………………….....................

Here I am in history of magic. Professor Binns is sooo boring. I look to my left, and I see Diana asleep, and to my right, I see Esmeralda lost in her own thoughts. And I look in front of me and see Potter talking to- 

Whoa, wait a minute. Was I just paying attention to him? No, I was just looking around since I'm bored. And this is the second time realizing something with the word _whoa_.

And oh look at this, a note. Which says:

**__**

Hiya Evans,

Guess who this is? Too late! Say hi to Esmeralda and Diana. That was Sirius and Remus' request.

- James and company.

I elbowed Esmeralda and gave her the note, then to Diana who just woke up.

"See," Diana started, "he does like you,"

"No he doesn't_. _Just_ because _hesaid hi, doesn't prove that he likes me," Esmeralda said not even trying to believe Diana.

"Whatever," Diana said while she rolled her eyes. Then another note came.

**__**

Well, aren't you gonna respond?

- J, S, and R (A/n: Peter isn't in this class).

"Well write something back," Diana told me.

"Do I have to?" I whined.

"Look, you can just say hi back or at least say sod off. Wait just say hi," she replied knowing that I would say' sod off'.

"Ugh, fine," so I wrote:

**__**

Potter and groupie,

Hi,

__

- E, D and L.

He wrote back: **Evans, Can I ask you a question?**

I wrote back: **Can you?**

Potter: **What?**

Me**: you're not supposed to say can I it's may I. **

Potter: **well, may I?**

I was about to write back no, but Diana beat me to it. And she didn't say no, she said: _yes you may James._ Oh god! Can you be any nicer? Well maybe she can, but not me. Especially to _him._ I'm just nervous on what he's going to say.

**__**

Evans,

Will you go out with me?

I snatched the note from Diana's hand and read it. I wrote back:** NO YOU ARROGANT PIG!!!!**

__

LILY:

You might as well send him a howler. 

-Sirius

"Lily, he has a point," Esmeralda told me which I chose to ignore.

**__**

Evans,

Why won't you go out with me? -James. P.s. Diana sit with me at lunch? -Remus.

James,

Lily has chosen to ignore your notes fore the rest of the class. And I would love to sit with you at lunch Remus 

- Xoxo Diana

P.s. the xoxo was just for Remus.

Diana,

Don't leave us hanging. It's not fair Remus is the only one who gets the loving. 

-Sirius.

Diana and Esmeralda giggled and I rolled my eyes. For the rest of the class my friends socialized with people I hate the most. Besides Remus. Once class was over I got my stuff and headed to the great hall for lunch. Diana and Esmeralda were still talking to Sirius and Remus.

"HEY EVANS!"

"Oh god," I mumbled, "What do you want Potter?".

"Why won't you go out with me?" he said actually looking serious.

"You really want to know?" I asked.

"Yes, I do," he told me seriously.

"Because you act to self-centered. You are one of the most conceited people I know," I told him. At first, I thought I saw hurt in his eyes. But **_no_**, I was wrong.

"But what about my lovely charm?" he said grinning, " doesn't that count?"

"See there you go again. Being the conceited person you are," I said getting frustrated.

"Oh come on. You know you like me Lily Flower," he continued sensing my frustration. 

"I will never like. Look at the way you act. If you would actually listen to what I have to say, I wouldn't hate you,".

"What?" he said with his grin fading.

"If you were a little less of a prick, I probably talk to you, actually call you James instead of Potter," I went on, " if you didn't annoy me, you could probably be my friend,".

I look into his eyes and I really do see hurt. All I could do is look and turn away. I can feel him look at me, but I don't turn around.

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A/n: I would like to say thank you to mmsaidpotterluva and Anne-Evans for reading this story. 


	4. No more hating you Well maybe

Through my eyes

I do not own anything. I only own the characters you don't recognize.

Ch. 4: No more hating you. Well maybe.

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I was in the common room doing my Charms homework when Diana and Esmeralda came up to me.

"Hey," I said to them. I could feel them staring at me. I was trying to ignore them, but I couldn't. 

"What are you guys staring at?" I demanded. 

"We heard what you told James," Diana told me.

"Oh," I replied. 

"He's really upset," Esmerelda added.

"Oh," I said again. And note to self, stop saying oh.

"Oh? Only oh? The only thing you can think of is 'oh'?" Diana asked me.

"What do you want me to say?" I replied to her. For I really didn't know what to say. Why is this happening to me?

"Well, you can tell me why all of a sudden you said those things to him," Diana told me. 

"He wanted to know why I didn't want to go out with him," I explained to them, "and I told him why. I told him everything I thought," 

"I guess the truth does hurt then," Esmeralda said.

"I should talk to him, shouldn't I?" I don't know why I asked that question. I know I should, even if I didn't want to. I hurt him bad.

"I think you should Lil," Esmeralda told me as she rubbed my shoulder.

"Ok," I got up.

"He's at the lake," Diana announced.

*****************************

Once I got to the lake, I saw him sitting on the grass. He was just looking straight ahead of him. It looked like he was in a trance. Once I was near him I asked: "May I sit here?" all he did was nod. 

I kept my eyes on the water when I told him: "I'm sorry James,"

"Don't be," he said. Then he turned to be and said, "You just called me James," 

"What? Oh, I mean Potter," I said quickly. We were silent for a moment, until he spoke.

"I'm the one who should me sorry. You were right. If actually listen to you, I would know you. You deserve to hate me," he admitted. I think it's time to break this sad moment.

"I don't hate you. I loathe you," I said with a small smile on my face.

"Well that makes me feel better," he replied sarcastically, but he had a small smile on his face too.

I couldn't help but smile more. Maybe I can become friends with him but remember, I said _maybe_. 

"So you're not going to hate me anymore?" he asked me.

"Ha! Of course I'll still hate you. But I can probably develop not to hate you," I answered him.

"I can deal with that," he said. 

"But starting over is a start though," I told him.

"Starting over how?" he asked me.

"Like 'Hi, my name is Lily Evans I still hate you but will probably not hate you later on'," I said.

"Ok. So my name is James Potter and I will try not to annoy you anymore," he told me with a grin. Except this time, his grin didn't irritate me.

"Very good," I complimented him. "Now, tell me your birthday, favorite color, and who your parents are,"

"February 4th, blue, and my parents are Larissa and Benjamin Potter,"

"You are getting better and better," I told him.

"Now it's my turn. What is your most embarrassing moment?" he asked me.

"I am not telling you," He must be crazy to think I will ever tell him.

"Oh, but you have to in order for me to get to know you," he said while he tried to hold back laughter.

"I hate you," I told him and glaring at him playfully.

"I know you do," he said with a big smile on his face. I don't know why, but I burst out laughing and he joined in too.

We talked for about an hour, and I never told him what my most embarrassing moment was. We started to head back to the Great Hall for dinner when he told me that Sirius had liked Esmeralda ever since the end of 5th year. 

"And one night, we heard Sirius say he liked Esmeralda more than food. We started to laugh hysterically," he said laughing himself.

"Is it even possible for Sirius to like something or someone for than food," I replied laughing also.

"With Sirius, everything is a surprise," he told me. We finally reached the Great Hall. I was about to tell him that I actually enjoyed talking to him, when he beat me to it.

"I had a good time talking to you," he told me truthfully.

"Same here," I agreed.

"I'll get you to go out with me later," he said with a little smirk. I gave him a look that meant 'in your dreams'. He gave me a small laugh that was actually charming. Whoa! And there I go again with that word.

"Well, goodbye… James,"

He smiled at me and said: "Bye Lily,"

I went to go sit with Diana and Esmeralda. When I got there the attacked me with questions. Be fore I answered them; I looked at James and saw that he was in the same situation. He saw me and smiled at me and I smiled too.

Who knows what the future may bring. It might actually be a good future. And I think I might actually enjoy it too. And what in the hell did I just say there. All I was trying to say was that- ugh never mind.

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A/n: hey. And all I can think of right know is hey. Oh and please review. Gracias. 


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